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Giving Med To Child In Care

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Jenarry | 01:01 Mon 16th Feb 2015 | Health & Fitness
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Not sure where to put this but this section seems as good as any.
I used to have a very close relationship with my niece who has just turned 9yrs. She often used to spend the whole weekend with us ,having sleepovers and days out to some lovely places with my son who is the same age as her.They were more like brother and sister and they both loved these times together. well it's all stopped last sept with no warning as my brother(the girl's dad ) has left her mum and is now with someone else and they have a baby togetherMy brother gets to see his daughter on the mum's terms but me ,my son and hubby and my mum and dad are barred from seeing her.
Her main reason that she screamed down the phone to me whilst i was talking to my niece one day -is that that she warned us(SHE DIDN'T) that if any of us have anything to do with the new gf and 'The thing' (her words for the newborn baby) that we are not going to see Ellie my niece. we didin't know there was a choice to be had-whether she said that to my brother and didn't pass it on I think is probably the case.
she has since said that I used to give ellie medicine without checking with her 1st so she doesn't want me to see her. what a load of rubbish. I am a fully qualified dispensary technician and I have been in the job 20 odd years. I know my nieces medical history and i gave her medicine that I know her mum gives her.Paracetamol one day for a pain somewhere(its so long ago I cant remember) and some piriton med for the allergic reaction to all the flea bites she had from home. :( it was driving her mental with the itching. Was i being so out of line?...This all coming from the woman who has an alcoholic living with her who social services have become aware of and said that he shouldnt be around the kids so my niece is on an at risk register,(he not supposed to live in the house but is still there) she lets her wander around the streets at all times day and night and has done for years and I have just found out she is letting her skive off school . it was 3 days last 2week and one day a friend of the family dragged her off the street because she was walking around the streets plastered in SO MUCH make-up like an 18 yr old...she is 9!
i worry about her so much,about the route she going down and that we cant even see her as we was the grounded part of her life. It makes me so so sad. I feel so helpless.
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I feel like i've lost a huge part of our family and we won;t get her back...:(




Do you live near your niece? If she's allowed to wander the streets day and night, can she easily get to your house? Can you get some money to her so she can get a bus or taxi to you?
I feel for you. You obviously love her very much, and her mum sounds like one of those awful mothers you read about in the papers. (apologies if I've gone to far there). I don't know what to suggest. Could your brother apply for custody?
Sadly there is very little that you can do as legally you don't have any rights, her father my be able to if that is what he wants. If you draw attention to your niece's home life she could end up in care.It's the devil and the deep blue sea.
The situation must break your heart, I'm so sorry.
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No you are about right cloverjo unfortunately .
She has stopped my contact with my niece before over a storm in a teacup and I didn't see her for months.
Then my niece contacted me herself on fb and arranged to see me and contact started again -in hindsight I realised she had done this without her mum knowing ,which she would have hated . This time her mum has blocked my phone number from her phone and has blocked me from her and her older daughters facebook so my niece has no way of contacting me . ...and I haven't even done anything. I haven't got involved with the falling out or taken sides.It's very hard to come to terms with and there isn't anything I can do. I have considered contacting the social services who are already involved with the family but I don't know what it would achieve. And if it ever came to it wired ,I would take my niece in ,in a heartbeat. Just to be able to resume contact with her would be fabulous. I shudder to think how things are going for her now.
her mum has never been that bothered with her and she is stopping us from seeing her out of spite to all of us as my brother has moved on.
The mum has 6 kids (my niece is the youngest) and god knows how many grandchildren so she has family coming out of her ears. We are a small close knit family and my niece was a part of our small loving family and now she has been taken from us. it makes me very sad.
jen, what happened to your brother/partner and baby . last you posted they were staying with your parents ?
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They had the ok from the social services to go back to their own place the week after christmas Anne... much to everyone's relief! it was all getting a bit fraught with them all under each others feet.
I am happy to say that everything has been fine in that respect , they are looking after baby's needs,looking after their flat and not doing anything they shouldnt so social services are very happy and even more importantly baby boy is happy.
It sounds like you're more bothered about this situation than your brother is. Why isn't he doing more to help his child? Poor girl. If you can look after her, why not tell theSocial Services everything and offer to be her guardian? If it causes a ruck within the family, well tough. This child is at risk.
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Yes sadly i think that's true CloverJo .
Whenever me or my mum say anything to my brother about Ellie ,her general situation and whether we will be able to see her anytime soon, the stock short answer from him is that he doesn't want to rock the boat by saying anything to the mum.
Which I can understand that he doesn't want his contact to stop but it's all so wrong at the moment. I said for him to contact social services himself and tell them what he knows such as the alcoholic bf still lives there, that she has been having lots of time of school for no reason etc but he doesn't want to go down that route as I think he thinks it will start a tit for tat thing with his ex telling the social services all sorts and causing them more problems with the ss than they already have. :(
I think my mind is made up now-I am going to ring them myself and hopefully something positive will come of it.
jen, will you tell your brother and parents you are contacting social services ?
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I'm not sure Anne. I did reason with my brother that contacting them was what should really be happening and he did see my point and agree but I think he is so worried about the backlash from the ex.
I think I will do it and see what advice/info i can get from them first.
It seems a bit like social services are focused on the baby and your niece is not part of their picture? She is of an age to have a say in her up bringing.
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It was a lot like that when making plans for when baby was here with the ss. it was all about what can be done to look out for baby and keep him happy and safe, when we voiced concerns how things go with ellie once baby was here they wanted to brush that under the carpet. She does have ss involved now with her due to concerns that I think mainly her school has brought to their attention and they will be hearing from me too.
Oh i hope your niece gets to go back with you jenarry,xx The big thing is once again is HER Choice ! She has a voice!

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