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Still hurts

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wendilla | 12:05 Thu 01st Oct 2009 | Animals & Nature
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It is exactly 4 weeks to day since I had to have my lovely golden labrador put to sleep.He was 14 but he is still everywhere all the things he did keep coming back. I know it will get better and a lot of you helped me with your kind words at the time.I have lit a candle for him every day .It may sound silly but I feel that if I do that he will still know I remember him. Just had to have a little talk about him.
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I know how hard it is when you lose a pet, the reminders are everywhere. It does get better, but you will never forget all the fun he put into your life. I miss saying that B dog when she used to trip me up, but most of all going to the back door and finding it still locked as I hadn't had to let the dog out.
We have been through it 5 times and it doesn't get any easier, but the memories are great! I like the time that Chien ( how naff was that) bit an insurance man who said he was great with dogs and shoved his hand in his face ---Chien bit his hand!
xx Barbara
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I have a Hannes macaw and she used to shout his name at the top of her voice She has said it a few times but seems to be getting less as she is not hearing it . As soon as I turn the back door key she says gO ON GO AND WEE WEE. But I am not the only one people that have gone through it understand. Every time I come in from shops she says Have you been a good boy? Thank you for your reply
I had to have one of my border collies put to sleep a few months ago, she was 13. Still have here litter sister who is 14 now and her health is not as good as it could be. It really hurt when Susie died (and still does) and when Meg can't carry on any longer I will be devastated.

Keep lighting candles for him, he knows you miss him but he had to go. My thoughts are with you, Wendyxx
As I have observed before on AB, the minute we start to care for anyone or anything, there is pain at the end of it somewhere. That is part of the commitment we make when we decide to live with our pets.

Of course, knowing that rationally does nothing heal the emotional pain of loss - that is something that has to be endured without relief or short-cuts - only with the knowledge that time does heal, but again, that really doesn't help in these early days.

Don't try and fight your feelings. Remember your friend with love and affection, and know that he is not in pain, and that he loved you as you loved him.

I think having a little talk from time to time - especially to sympathetic ears which you find here, is a good thing to do. It gets your thoughts and memories in order, and helps to come to terms with the fact that althoug he is gone, he remains a big part of your life, which is as it should be.

In time the pain will receed, but the good memories will always remain. You wil forget the tears over his loss, but remember the fun you had with him, and he had with you.
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andy-hughes has said, and better said, what I would. I can add that my poodle, Benny, died one year ago this coming Tuesday. I have his daughters and one of his grandaughters here, but that made no difference to the grieving then. Every night I still blow out the last candle and say 'Goodnight Benny !' before going to bed This is now part of the nightly routine, but it reminds me of a special dog.He is not grieved for, but remembered and little characteristic things he did still come to mind from time to time, and make me smile. That's how it should be,I think.
I don't think that we are faced with the "it was only a dog/cat" statements that we used to get when a furry friend dies. My animals have always been my children and are loved very much.

I hope that you have somebody that you can talk to about your dog - your friend in a hairy coat. It really does help to laugh about some of the stupid things that he did and some of the sweet and cute things too.

It is never easy to lose a good friend but at 14 he had a reasonably long life and, being a lab, one filled with fun and food.

Best wishes.
Susan
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Thank you all for your kind words and yes MISS MEG i HAVE A Lighted candle every day for him on the shelf above his bed where he slept.Just in the process of getting a framed picture done to sit there. It is getting easier to talk about him It all comes back when the post man comes no one to fetch it. He was a hit with all the neighbours.Even the postman took him up all the paths for a walk when he couldn't walk very far. I can't get out of the habit of not having to rush back in case he wanted out or if I was late for his dinner. It was nearly 14 years of habit. Thank you all. It helps to talk and read what other people have gone through.

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