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Jokes

Looking for a laugh? There are plenty of funny jokes being told on The AnswerBank, so sit back, relax and have a read.

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Canary42
Different Box for different generation. https://ibb.co/BBVKygj       ...
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Rondy
An invisible man married an invisible woman.
Their kids were nothing to look at either. ___ Went to see the worst faith healer ever last night.
He was so bad, even a bloke in a wheelchair got up and... ...
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zabado
Last night I went to a fancy dress party dressed as a big chicken and I met a gorgeous woman dressed as a giant egg. In answer to that age old question .  .  .  It was the chicken.
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Hazlinny
How did Mary and Joseph get their groceries delivered?  On a Lidl donkey. You don't realise how old you are until you sit on the floor to wrap Christmas presents and then try to get up. Just rang... ...
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Rondy
I was out on a date with a really hot woman, well, I say "date", we had dinner and watched a movie and then the plane landed. ___ Who sings 'Mistletoe and wine' whilst cleaning the kitchen?
Cif... ...
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Rondy
My mate was upset when his Playstation died.
So I went over there to console him.
___

For years I played brass in a well known orchestra.
I'm a truly gifted musician particularly with lower pitch... ...
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Rondy
Rose accompanied her husband Tom to his annual checkup. While Tom was getting dressed, the doctor came out and said to Rose, “I don’t like the way he looks.” “Neither do I,” she said. “But he’s... ...
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Chipchopper
I remember one Christmas, I offered to pop the cork of a bottle of fizzy pop outside to avoid anyone getting caught in the crossfire. Not so lucky was that low-flying seagull! ๐Ÿ˜™
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Rondy
A man got drunk and came home very late. He sat on the door step for thirty (30) minutes trying to figure out what to tell his harsh and super strict wife the reason for his lateness. He gained... ...
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Rondy
An old, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of. He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on... ...
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Canary42
I wonder if the spammer destinycgh (now quite rightly banned) was aware of the des-tiny-cgh interpretation for his recent advert for male enhancement.  Or maybe 'twas an AI bot!!!! [I'll see myself... ...
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Khandro
Unwoke, hilarious, & I nearly fell off my chair laughing;  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SlOHo5cu1a0   ...
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Rondy
Car Dealer: "This car had just one careful owner."
Buyer: "But look at it, it's a wreck!"
Car dealer: "Well yes, you see, the other seven owners weren't quite as careful." ___ Kathy goes to her local... ...
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Patsy33
  A pantomime horse walks into a bar. The barman says ‘Fancy a pint?’ The horse says ‘No, two halves, thanks.’
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melv16
...beer and making love in a canoe have in common? They're both 'king close to water๐Ÿ˜
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Rondy
Please be very careful on the roads over the Christmas period!
A lot of men will be drinking and allowing their wives to drive .
___

If the world's population where to hold hands along the equator a... ...
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Rondy
I collect a lot things related to antique implements of torture and execution, so when a French guillotine basket turned up for auction, naturally I was interested.
However, when it came to the... ...
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Rondy
Murphy drops a slice of buttered toast on the kitchen floor and it lands butter-side-up. He looks down in astonishment, for he knows that it's a law of nature of the universe that buttered toast... ...
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Rondy
Lance isn't a common name these days.
But in medieval times, people were named
Lance a lot.
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Job advertisement: burrowing rodent required.
Should I gopher it?
___

Quibbled over the price of Ulysses... ...

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